"I have work. Then a dinner thing, and then I am busy trying to become who I am." - Hannah, Girls

Thursday, May 19, 2016

Can you pass the salt? No, the white rock salt. Not that bourgie, pink Himalayan shit.

This morning after my sister and I went to the gym, I made myself a salted caramel protein shake. The shake itself isn't worth writing about, honestly. But the coarse salt I added in is worth writing about.

Salt is damn good. You can put it on chocolate or brussels sprouts. You can put it on shitty dining hall food and make almost anything worth eating.

I love salt. The coarser, the better. But when it comes down to it, I prefer sweet over salty. Though. when I'm on a health kick, salt is the winner. And so protein shakes with salt, vegetables with salt, chicken doused in soy sauce, and diet cokes with 40mg of sodium is the answer now days.

I just followed an insane amount of celebrities on Snapchat. From Kim Kardashian to Bob Saget. I'm most excited about John Mayer. I look forward to hearing his disgustingly good voice every night as I lay in bed clicking through stories.

After I'm done, I close my eyes, try to sleep, and think about my workout in the morning. I wonder how long it will take for me to lose weight. I ask myself how I could be so stupid and gain back everything I lost. I debate the comfiest sleeping position. My questions are never resolved, but my questions don't matter anyways.

The real question is who is the next John Mayer. Because I want to marry him. Or even date him and be dumped, that's more than fine with me. *bonus: I may get a song written about me.

Speaking of music, this is my new ringtone:

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